August 21, 1973 - April 11, 2017
Nita Thongchai was born on August 21st, 1973. The world became a bit quieter and less fun on the morning of Tuesday, April 11, 2017. There were many hardships during her lifetime, but Nita always overcame those obstacles. Either this was because of her epic stubbornness or her unbreakable will, we may never know. Several things we are certain of however are; She was the first to laugh and most likely the loudest. She loved her friends and family to a fault. This was rivaled only by her love for animals and children. She would always help anyone in need, even if at times people didn't deserve it. Her loss will always be felt and she will be deeply missed. Nita's memory lives on through her family and friends and she will never be forgotten. Her memorial visitation will be on Tuesday, April 25th (The Perfect Date) from 4pm to 8pm at Ringa Funeral Home, 122 S. Milwaukee Ave. Lake Villa, IL 60046. Some of her loved ones will be speaking on her behalf at 7pm with an opportunity for others to speak as well. From Nita's brother Nat: Thank you all for coming today. I apologize if this is super long or if I jump around a bit but honestly I have no idea how to sum up a lifetime's worth of memories and experiences in any given amount of time. You may have noticed there's cupcakes here. The reason for that is, every year on my birthday without fail, Nita would complain to me about how when she was a kid she missed out on cupcakes from her school Valentine's Day party because she got pulled out of class because her little brother decided to inconvenience her by being born. My bad. So today here's some cupcakes, red velvet no less which were her favorite. It's been two weeks since I lost my sister and within that time I've been trying to figure out how to put all that hurt and pain into words. What throws me off completely is that normally if something his big happened in my life, she would be the first person I would call and be like.. you'll never guess what happened. Well, I wouldn't have said it quite like that, but there are kids here, but you get the idea. With Nita not being here, I turned to friends for advice or just simply a shoulder to lean on. I've spoken to a lot of people and everyone has given me bits of advice. Some of which I've definitely taken to heart. One thing Jim told me is that this will be the hardest thing I'll ever have to do. At first I had thought he meant dealing with the death of my sister, but maybe he meant the hardest thing I'll ever have to do is actually moving forward and living. Because living on and moving forward is what's hard especially when so many things remind me of Nita. Nita would say that her and I were two sides of the same coin meaning while we were the same some things about us were polar opposites. I prefer cold, she liked it hotter than the motherland. I'm normally the quiet one and well let's just say you pretty much knew when she was in the room. For me to say my sister was the biggest influence on my life would be an understatement. Even before I was born, she was paving the way for me. The very first thing she did (aside from complaining about cupcakes) was to give me what would eventually become my permanent legal name. I asked her about how is it that even though our parents never named me Nat but yet here I am today using that name. She told me that before I was born she met me in a dream and asked me what my name was and that I had said Nat. So after I was born she always called me Nat. I'm not sure if that was true since she told me many many things that as a kid I'm sure traumatized me. For example.. when we were kids, she would tell me, if you see a dragonfly, be sure to cover your mouth or else they'll sew it shut! So imagine chubby naive kid me running around with my hand over my mouth whenever we were by dragonflies. Or she would tell me that water towers were actually swimming pools or roller skating rinks. Yeah.. she messed with me quite a bit. But even with all the alternative facts she would feed me, I would never have given any of it up. And even though she would mess with me, I knew she cared about me and was fiercely protective. Between keeping me from falling out of a window in a high rise apartment when we lived in the city, or pushing me out of the way of a car at an apple orchard or well beating up bullies that would pick on me she was always there. Yeah.. she beat up a boy that was picking on me, that wasn't awkward for all parties involved at all. Accomplishments Nita accomplished much in her lifetime. Between all her degrees and her career in law enforcement, making sure people were safe and bad guys were caught I can only hope she knew how damned proud of her I was. I wish I could have told her that more often. Emotions I've been going through all the different stages of grieve between anger and sadness everything in between trying to cope with things. While I had an idea of what to expect, I didn't know all of those emotions would hit at the same time, anytime, anywhere. I figure the best thing I could do is to talk about what I'm thankful for; Thanks I'm thankful that even though there were plenty of hard times in her life that she was always able to find a way to laugh, live and love. As I was looking through all of her old pictures I realized that there was more to my sister than I knew about and that she had a whole other life when not being my guardian. Seeing her smile in all these pictures warmed my heart and makes me extremely thankful for all of her friends in her life. That she was able to enjoy life and have good times and good memories with all of you is something else that I can't put into words. Tanya you were one of her best and oldest friends. Thank you for sharing a lifetime with my sister. Sam between you Johnny and Tanya, I'm not sure who was in more pictures with her which is saying a lot. Johnny.. I can't put it all into words to express my gratitude to you. You were there for Nita even more so than myself or my mother. I know she was difficult at times but I also know that she was happy to be with you and that the good outweighs all of the bad. I can never fully express to you how much it means to me that you were there with and for my sister. One thing is certain, no matter where life takes us, you will always be family to me. Melissa, you were always there for her when she needed someone to lean on. Thank you for being there for her. Rachael, when you first met my sister, you just about ran away because you were so intimidated by her, actually you more turned and walked away quickly and left her standing there confused wondering what just happened. I always teased her because I blamed it on her being so intimidating which she would totally try to deny. I'm thankful that the two of you were able to get to know each other and that she came to think of you as her sister. I only wish you could have had more time with her. Tony and Kara. My sister loved you two more than you'll ever know. She wasn't able to have kids of her own and I'm deeply saddened by that but I'm glad she got to know the both of you. She would always ask about the two of you and would always help me to be a better father since her and I knew how it was not having a good one around. Forgive me for not mentioning everyone else individually. I'm sure as her friend, you knew how she felt about you and know I'm thankful for all of you as well. I'm thankful she taught me how to be a better man, a better brother, a better father and a better husband even though all of which I'm sure still need work. I'm thankful that she doesn't have to endure anymore pain or hardships. Thank you Nita for all of the things you taught me. Except for when you tied teaching me to catch when I was a kid. I'm pretty sure throwing softballs at my face and telling me to catch wasn't the best way that could have been handled. For those of you who didn't have a chance to meet her or only met her recently, I wish you could have met her when she was at her best. Knowing how she was when she was at her best lets me appreciate and miss her even more. The things I'll miss.. She was the geekiest geek and the nerdiest nerd but you'd never know. Between X-Files conventions, Star Trek Conventions, Stargate conventions, Comic cons , Battlestar Galactica, Dr. Who and Roswell New Mexico’s 50th anniversary a couple of years ago she definitely cemented her place in geekiness. Not to mention her love for her favorite comic book hero, Batgirl. This makes me think of our sibling trips Sibling Trips New Mexico / Inn of the Mountain Gods /New Orleans/ Wisconsin Dells / Florida / California/ St Louis As a family, my sister my mom and I would go on vacation here and there, but Nita and I also had our sibling trips where it was just the two of us. I think from the trips we would go on together and just life in general, we learned a lot of what to not do in certain situations. When we were in New Mexico we decided to stop at the side of the road to look at all the stars and we were like wow look at that! .. followed by, are those bullet holes in that sign? We got back in the car and moved on. Or while driving into town we saw some guy randomly laying on the hood of his car. We asked each other , did you see that? Followed by, nope, I didn't see anything. We knew the classic horror movie mistakes so we wouldn't be like... I'll be right baaaack or saying things like hey let's chance it.. not to say we didn't make some bad decisions here and there but, that was part of the adventure. It's also amusing that I'm pretty sure some of our trips were based on food. Between ribs from questionable locations in St Louis, to Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwiches at Graceland or Beneignts at Cafe du Monde in New Orleans, not to mention a certain seafood buffet in Florida that I'm sure to this day will never forget hurricane Nita who hit their all you can eat seafood buffet. She rocked that buffet like Godzilla smashing through Tokyo. We still had plans to go to lots of other places together on other sibling trips. -- This pendant I'm wearing, it has some of her ashes in it so I can be sure that in all my travels, she'll be there with me. Her laughter and her voice She was loud. I mean seriously. If you knew her you know she didn't utilize an inside voice much. This one time we were at a casino and she was all excited about the big Bingo area... until I pointed out the sign that said you HAD to be quiet or you would be removed. She said she could do that but we both pretty much agreed she'd probably have been kicked out within 10 minutes of sitting down. If you fell she'd of course laugh at you, but she'd also be one of the first people to make sure you were ok and to help you get back up. Her intelligence For me, before Google there was Nita and encyclopedias (those are books for you younger people here). Anytime I didn't know something, my sister was there to fill in the blanks. Of course after the age of Google she'd call me and tell me to Google things for her so I guess that's fair. Being her younger brother was tough when it came to school. Especially grade school. She'd get straight A's, and then the nuns would get me in their class and just be like... what happened ? High school was pretty much the same though we were only at the same school for 1 year. We spent many mornings getting breakfast and having a late start at school and I still laugh when I think about the time a girlfriend got all jealous and was like "I saw you walking down the hall with *that* girl!" to which of course I responded with.. you mean my sister? Then there was a time at a restaurant where some guy was like heyyy you're girlfriend is hot! And I was like.. she's my sister.. of course the guy says oh... is she single? Kara Nita So when my daughter was born I had already known that my sister had a hard life. So that went into why Kara's middle name is Nita. One to honor my sister and two because a part of me wants a Nita Thongchai to have a good life in this world free of the hardships my sister had to endure. Course when another friend of mine pointed out Kara's name if said quickly could be Carnitas I wasn't sure what to say about that. Firsts As the older sibling, she introduced me to many firsts. My first corndog, my first snow cone, my first broken finger. She clearly lead the trail and blazed a path for me to follow. But now I have to travel that path without her in the lead. I can only hope she'll be watching over me and be at my side going forward. She knew. One last hug. The Friday while she was in the hospital, before she went back to the ICU, I went to see her and while I was there she was determined to sit up. I remember helping her sit up and she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a hug. At the time I didn't think anything of it, and was actually a little confused since we'd never been the huggy type of siblings which I now regret a lot. It's like she knew what was going to happen. Before she passed I had several moments alone with her and I would talk to her and hope that she could hear me. The one thing I said to her that I wish I could have told her before was simply, Thank you for being my sister. I know everyone says I shouldn't feel things like guilt or regret but that's just not possible for me. I'll always feel that I should have been a better brother to her, that I should have done more or been there more. And I will always regret not telling her that I loved her and was thankful she was my sister more often. What she leaves behind; Her determination. Her strength. Her love and many many cherished memories. Of course she also left me a lot of paperwork and other crap to deal with, so ya know, thanks for that. Take care of the living. I wish she would have left me a note, instructions of some kind. Something that was plainly obvious like.. hey! Read this! Do This! Something that would help me from feeling so lost. But in the end I guess she was able to teach me yet another thing. That I need to be stronger than I was the day before and to keep moving forward no matter how much it hurts. I want to say to all of Nita's friends. If you ever need help, don't hesitate to let me know. While I can never take her place nor would I want to, I'd want to help take care of the people that meant so much to her in this life. Closing The last thing I want to say is to my sister, something that I hope someone will say for me one day. Nita, you've done enough. You've done more than enough, and taken on more than your share. You can finally rest now and be at peace. I love you sibling.
Nita Thongchai was born on August 21st, 1973. The world became a bit quieter and less fun on the morning of Tuesday, April 11, 2017. There were many hardships during her lifetime, but Nita always overcame those obstacles. Either this was because... View Obituary & Service Information
Obituary & Service
Nita Thongchai was born on August 21st, 1973. The world became...View More
Flowers & Gifts
Send flowers to the Thongchai family.Send Flowers